Full Disclosure: I originally wrote this post on March 23, 2013. it will show up as being posted on that day ... But the introduction I added today (November 19, 2013 - 12:45 am CST.. It's a Tuesday. It's cold outside. And windy.) is from what the March 23, 2013 me would view as a "future self".. I have concluded that this equates to actual time travel and I have made my own version of "BACK TO THE FUTURE" ... :)
Anyway, I discovered today that I somehow never actually published this and instead, I saved it as a draft... And there it sat... Unpublished... Until this very moment right now TODAY!!!! Woooo! Go me! This isn't really something I should feel the need to celebrate finally accomplishing. It literally would have taken me 3 seconds to publish. Instead, when you account for the time I have spent typing this here paragraph.. I have successfully spent too much time on this task ... Too much = 20 minutes and 57 seconds too long.
Anyway, if you continue to read on, you will soon discover why I felt that writing the paragraph above was totally necessary (it's not. But whatever). And that reason is because it illustrates the main point of what this whole thing below was written about in a nut shell. And that's fucking funny as hell to me.
I need to laugh at myself, to find the humor in everything... If I don't, the emotions of the world end up piling on top of each other all around me, and in my heart and mind. Writing like I am now also helps me deal with life in general.
I'm really going to work on making this blog thingy a big part of each day/week or whatever ..
How else am I gonna remember ALL OF THE THINGS!!!??!
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/06/this-is-why-ill-never-be-adult.html?m=1(I encourage all to check out this blog if you haven't already, and this post of here in which I am specifically referencing all bolded and underline-y and shit. That's when you know I mean business folks. ;)
This concludes my unnecessary prologue to this equally unnecessary post which I wrote months and months ago and then somehow forgot to actually publish the post.
< This llama doesn't give a fucking shit. > *****
AND SO BEGINS ANOTHER TRUE LIFE DRAMA THAT IS ... The Days of MY Life:
POP QUIZ!: name where this quote is from, and be specific. Well, as specific as you could get I suppose... All you really have to do is name what movie it's from.
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Lucas: Joe, I think it's gonna be okay.
Joe: What makes you think that?
Lucas: Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear.
****
I'll give you a hint. The movie title has 2 words in it and those 2 words in itself could also be used to describe the important documents and idk, maybe records of some super ancient civilization that is led by a person who would be referred to as "emperor". An emperor is kind of like a president except emperors were super into doing things like crucifying hoards of peeps and putting heads on poles after be-heading someone pretty much just for the fun of it. They also really likes grapes, bath houses, in many cases preferred promiscuous relations with young boy prostitutes (like under 13) over promiscuous relations with grown women prostitutes with giant boobs who had an affinity to let those girls out for some fresh air, like 24/7. They pretty much had no need for tops, basically.
Alright, so now that I have provided you with what I think is probably the most epic hint EVER.... Name this movie... You have 25 seconds... The clock is ticking loudly with each second... Jeopardy music is playing in the background while you write your answer on the super cool jeopardy style final round screen thingies that I have so kindly provided you with...
You look as if you were writing a lot of shit down for that whole 25 seconds.. Were you just fake writing that whole time or what? Cuz your answer should only be 2 words.
Beep beep beep!!! Times up. Let's reveal your answers.
If you don't know the answer then you really don't deserve to know in the first place - my clues are probably the greatest clues that have ever been given for anything in the entire history of time.
There really was no point to any of this. It's okay though because I am 99.9% sure that no one is going to read this blog anyway, so fuck it - ill do what I want! It's my blog and not yours and it even has my name on it. So THERE! Take that. In your face. Sucka...
I don't even remember why I started writing this in the first place. My opening statement to this entry acknowledges that i realize how ridiculous I am and can be - and even though I never really managed to expand on why I was making that statement in the first place - I am pretty sure that the entirety of this blog post provides perfect evidence of my super ridonkulousness and all of its red hot fire-y but super cool and witty and sarcastic glory! BWAHAHAHAHA!
Oh! I remember now! It was to copy and paste what I just wrote in an email that I sent to my dad and my friend Cara with a picture attached of my baby boy sleeping in the car seat and being super cute and stuff. I am mostly posting a copy of this because I don't want to forget it and how fantastically ridiculous it truly is... Lol. Keep in mind that I truly did not have any intention of rambling on and on like this at all. I was just gonna send the picture and not write anything at all... But then something obviously compelled me to create this novel of an email:
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To: BFF4EVA, Daddy, And Myself
Subject: Proof that Charlie is probably the cutest baby that ever was!
March 23, 2013 @ 1:54 PM
If not the cutest in the entire world, then he is definitely in the top 10 and should get some sort of trophy or a stylish sash that states his super cuteness level. He fell asleep in the car on the way home from sephies vet appt and of course I had to stop and take this before I got him out of the car :) just wanted to share! Cara, just go back on Facebook dammit! Please? You can do it under a totally fake persona and name even. Even if it's just for me only. I will be your only fb friend Cara, and I would be proud of it! Just like in 3rd grade when Sam decided to announce to the whole class that I wasn't her best friend anymore for no reason at all other then, idk, maybe because I was just way too cool to handle and also wasn't afraid to tell it like it is when shit needed to be told! You remember Cara? Hurt and sad and embarrassed cuz this was in front of everyone, i said to myself "well now who is going to be my best friend :( *sniffle sniffle* *eyes tearing up*"... and this is where you enter the story Cara.. From across the room (somehow you were able to hear me say this quietly to myself, or maybe it was telepathically heard, that would make the most sense lol) - sitting at your desk which was RIGHT next to the teachers desk cuz you were such a little trouble maker, I hear an enthusiastic voice shout "I'll be your Best Friend Leah!!" - And that was that. BFF4EVA. So whats my point? Why am I writing this novel of an email that now includes this touching childhood memory?! BECAUSE YOU NEED TO COME BACK TO FACEBOOK, that's why. believe it or not (im walking on air.. hahaa) i did not intend for this email to include so many words and run on sentences and my trademark abuse of parenthesis usage at its finest.
I don't have ADHD at all, I swear... Really... Ha ha.. Ha... Ha.
And DADDY! I haven't forgotten you, don't worry! I know you will probably see this picture on fb and stuff but I wanted to email you the full size file so you can maybe make it the wall paper for your laptops desktop screen. You know you want to. Do it. DO IT! :)
Did you do it? All you have to do is right click on the picture when you download it and then click on "set as wall paper"... I think... You might have to go into the control panel and then to "Desktop Appearance" or something similar to that (it's an icon of a computer screen thingy lol) and then you change it there - I know what you are thinking... "Wow my daughter is so technologically intelligent! She should totally be an IT help desk person who helps people do shit on their computers and stuff!" Hahahahaha. My point is that you should definitely make this picture your wallpaper and you should do this right now. :) BTW, do you know if you are going to have to work on Easter?? Or if the kids will be coming at all?? I hope they can, but I'm sure something else is probably going on elsewhere :( just wait till you see what Charlie is going to be wearing... It's pretty awesome...! Lol :)
Btw, only the coolest babies wear their hats like this - Charlie would like you to know that. Also he would like you to know that he really loves that green melissa and Doug snake toy thing you see in his lap. He guards it with his life. He even looks like he has his hand in a fist just incase anyone (or toy monsters who ruin children's days by eating their toys for no good reason at all. They don't even need to eat toys to survive, toys are like snacks to them, you know.) tries to snatch it from him.
Okay I'm done now. I need a nap. Love you both!!
Leah Bo Beah OUT!
Sent from my iPhone
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YAY! The task I set out to accomplish initially is now complete! WOW! It's super hard for me to do that. Silly sounding I know, but I'm sure you have gathered that it is quite difficult for me just by reading this post alone (and by you I mean NO ONE.. Cuz no one will read it. I've sent links out to some people in the past, including my fiancé and baby daddy, and he didn't/won't ever read it. Soooo yeah. If someone really IS reading this that isn't me - please comment and make me aware of your existence!! It would mean more to me than most people, in really super sappy and emotional ways... LOL.)
I'm done with this shit.
Peace out mother fuckers.
Love,
Leah ❤
